Going “no contact” is a term used to describe the decision to cut off all communication with someone. It is often used to protect oneself from any harm or manipulation from another person.
Going no contact means that you will not accept calls, texts, emails, or other forms of contact from that person. It also means that you won’t engage in any conversations about them with mutual friends, family members, etc.
Why do people decide to go No Contact?
To Avoid Manipulation or Abuse: Going no contact is often used as a way to protect oneself from any manipulative or abusive behavior that someone may be exhibiting. It allows you to distance yourself from the person and reassert control over your own life.
To Set Healthy Boundaries: Setting healthy boundaries is an important part of maintaining relationships, and going no contact can be a way of enforcing those boundaries when they are violated.
For Closure: Sometimes it is necessary to cut off all communication in order to move on with one’s life after a difficult relationship ends. Going no contact can help provide closure and offer the opportunity for healing and growth.
To Escape Toxic Relationships: By going no contact, you can put an end to ongoing cycles of drama that come with toxic relationships and provide yourself with some much needed space and peace of mind.
How to set about going No Contact
Make Your Decision Firm and Clear: When you make the decision to go no contact, it is important to be firm and clear about it. Make sure that the other person understands that you are not open to further contact or communication.
Have a Support System in Place: Going no contact can be difficult, so make sure that you have supportive people around you who can provide emotional support throughout this process. Talk to a trusted friend or family member, or even find an online community of people who are also going no contact.
Find Strategies for Coping with Nostalgia: It’s normal to feel nostalgic when cutting off ties with someone important in your life, so it’s important to have strategies in place to help manage these feelings. Make sure you have activities and outlets such as exercise, meditation, art therapy and more that can help keep your emotions in check during this time.
Allow Yourself Time To Heal: Going no contact takes time and it is important to give yourself space and time to process all of the emotions coming up during this transition period. Take breaks when you need them and don’t put pressure on yourself for healing quickly; everyone’s journey is different.
Going No Contact with a Narcissist can be very hard
Narcissists are amongst the most toxic types of people you will ever come into contact with. You may have met one as a friend, co-worker, family member or spouse at some point in your life. Sometimes the only solution it to go No Contact and move on from the situation for good.
However, going No Contact with a narcissist is difficult. They will often react by unleashing their pack of flying monkeys, hoping that the abuse by proxy will intimidate you and bring you running back to them.
It is even harder to go no contact with a narcissist if that person is your parent. It’s difficult to ignore someone who was such a huge influence on your life growing up, even when they’re abusive. However sometimes it is necessary, no matter how difficult you might initially find it.
Tips for when you go No Contact with a narcissist –
Establish Your Boundaries: When going no contact with a narcissist, it’s important to establish your boundaries clearly and firmly. This may be difficult, as they may try to manipulate or gaslight you in order to stay connected with you. Make sure that your boundaries are firm and clear and that the person understands them.
Prepare Yourself For Resistance: Narcissists often put up strong resistance when someone tries to go no contact with them, so it’s important to be prepared for this. Practice any strategies for self-care or coping in advance so that you can stay in control when faced with resistance from the narcissist.
Don’t Give In To Guilt Trips: Narcissists are often very good at making people feel guilty for wanting to break free from their manipulations and fits of rage. If they attempt to make you feel guilty for wanting to protect yourself, remind yourself of why going no contact is necessary for your wellbeing and don’t give into their guilt trips.
Take Care Of Yourself First: During this process: It is essential to take care of yourself first before attempting to confront the narcissist or deal with their manipulation techniques. Make sure you have outlets or activities in place that will help keep your stress levels down during this process of going no contact.
How Long Does it Take for the Effects of No Contact to Show?
Depending on the length of the relationship, it can take anywhere from a few days to weeks for any significant changes to become noticeable.
Generally, most people will start to feel lighter and more in control within a few days of going no contact.
The longer you are able to go without contact, the greater the changes that you will notice in your life.
It may take several months or even years for all the effects of no contact to fully manifest. During this time, it is important to stay consistent in your efforts of self-care and ensure that you have healthy coping strategies in place.
Once enough time has passed, you should begin to experience the positive effects of no contact with the narcissist such as increased self-esteem, better sense of control over your life and improved mental health overall.
Final Thoughts
Narcissists are masters of manipulation, who will do anything to get what they want. They can quickly and easily find your vulnerabilities and use them against you.
In such cases, going no contact could be the best way to protect yourself from a narcissist. It’s not an easy task, but it is necessary if you want to heal and move forward with your life.
The reasons for going no contact are numerous and can be summed up in a few words: protection, self-care, healing, freedom.
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