Going no contact with a narcissistic grandmother can be a difficult and daunting task. Not only do you have to face the prospect of dealing with your own complicated emotions surrounding the decision, but you may also experience narcissistic rage from your grandmother and pushback from other family members who may not understand why you have chosen this route.
Navigating no contact with a narcissistic grandmother can be tricky and trying at times, but it is often necessary when our mental health and safety may be at stake because of the unhealthy relationships to continue.
This article will explore the implications of going no contact with a narcissistic grandparent, including potential reactions from both the grandparent and other family members.
Making the Decision to Go No Contact with Your Narcissistic Grandmother
Here are some tips for overcoming the challenges of cutting contact with a narcissistic grandmother.
Acknowledge Your Feelings
Recognize that the process will evoke strong emotions like fear, anger, guilt, sadness, and uncertainty.
Allow yourself to feel these emotions instead of repressing them as they will help move you forward in the healing process.
Take Time To Reflect
Consider why you have chosen to cut off contact with your grandmother and make sure you understand why this decision was necessary for your own mental health and safety, especially if it goes against your family or cultural norms.
Draw a line between healthy interaction and unhealthy interaction by establishing firm boundaries so that all family members understand and respect your decision.
This could involve not responding to certain calls or emails or refraining from discussing certain topics.
Connect with friends and family members who can provide emotional support throughout this process.
Having someone who understands what you’re going through can be incredibly helpful when navigating challenging times like this one.
Reframe Your Thoughts
Take time to re-frame negative thoughts about yourself or your choice to go no contact with your grandmother into more constructive ones such as “I am taking care of my mental health by rethinking how I interact with her” or “I am setting healthy boundaries because I respect myself enough not to allow toxic interactions” – this can help maintain a more positive outlook on the situation.
Cutting ties with anyone we love can be hard, and even harder when it concerns a beloved grandparent, but sometimes it is our safest option for protecting ourselves from toxicity and manipulation within relationships.
By acknowledging our emotions surrounding this decision, reflecting on why we have chosen no-contact, setting boundaries, seeking support, and reframing our thoughts accordingly, we can take steps towards healing from any hurt caused by maintaining an unhealthy relationship dynamic with a narcissistic relative like our grandmothers.
Reactions from Your Narcissistic Grandparent
Denial. Their first reaction will be to reject the possibility that you have indeed made a decision to go no contact with them.
They will be sure that they will be able to manipulate you back into the relationship.
Narcissistic Rage. Narcissists hate to be thwarted, and the likelihood is that your narcissistic grandmother will be furious when she realizes that you have had the courage to take a stand.
Projection. Once the anger has died down, they will use projection in order to blame you with all that is wrong in the relationship.
Because let’s face it, it is NEVER the narcissist’s fault.
They are also likely to use various techniques to try to manipulate you back into a relationship with them. The following are some examples.
Guilt-tripping. They will suddenly start suffering from multiple ailments and use other family members to tell you that they are heart broken.
Making false promises. They will resort to future faking, making promises that they have no intention to keep.
Grandiose displays of affection and love. They are likely to love bomb you with gifts and invitations, trying to manipulate you to change your mind.
Using threats or blackmail. If all else fails, they are likely to resort to coercion, for example by threatening to cut you out of their will if you do not change your mind.
Reactions from Other Family Members
Family members may react differently when you tell them about your decision to go no contact with a narcissistic grandmother.
Some might be understanding and supportive, while others may be shocked or angry.
Here are some tips on how to communicate with family members after making the decision to go no contact with your narcissistic grandmother:
Be honest. Explain your thoughts and feelings in a clear, concise manner.
Avoid labeling or blaming. Focus on explaining why you need to take this step and how it will benefit you in the long run, instead of negatively labeling or blaming anyone else.
Keep in mind the fact that it is not your job to diagnose personality disorders, so do not use any of that terminology.
Acknowledge their perspective. Let them know that you understand and respect their point of view, even if it is not the same as yours.
Focus on yourself. Remember that this is ultimately about making the best choice for yourself, rather than trying to please others or change their minds.
It is important to remember that everyone has their own unique perspective and they may not always agree with your decision.
They might even attempt to convince you otherwise, but ultimately it should be up to you and the choice should be respected by those who are close to you.
Final Thoughts on Going No Contact with a Narcissistic Grandmother
Going no contact with a narcissistic grandmother can be a difficult and emotionally draining experience.
It is important to always keep in mind that you are making the best decision for yourself, and to maintain respect for all family members throughout the process.
It may take some time for everyone to adjust, but with honest communication and understanding it is possible to maintain relationships within the family while still taking care of yourself first and foremost.