Sometimes, the only way to free yourself from the clutches of a narcissist is to completely block them, severing all forms of communication. It’s a step that requires immense strength and courage. However, before going no contact and blocking them, it is important to consider how the narcissist will react to being blocked, in order to be prepared for any fallout.
The Impact of Being Blocked on the Narcissist
When you block a narcissist and cut off all communication with them, the impact on them can be profound, affecting both their narcissistic supply and their public image.
Losing Narcissistic Supply
Narcissistic supply refers to the attention, admiration, or even fear that narcissists crave from others to validate their inflated self-image. This supply serves as a vital fuel for their ego, and any disruption can lead to significant psychological consequences.
When you decide to block a narcissist, you effectively cut off this vital supply. As a result, they may experience what is known as a narcissistic wound. This term describes a deep emotional hurt to their fragile ego, which they perceive as a direct attack on their self-esteem and self-worth.
Your decision to block them strikes at the very heart of their identity, challenging their inflated self-perception and causing them to confront feelings of inadequacy and rejection that they typically avoid.
One of the fundamental aspects of a narcissist’s identity is the carefully crafted façade they present to the world. This façade often portrays them as superior, charismatic, and invulnerable.
However, when you block a narcissist, you essentially shatter this illusion, leading to a significant loss of face.
Public rejection, such as being blocked, can be deeply destabilizing for a narcissist.
It directly contradicts their self-perception and exposes their vulnerabilities, which they painstakingly hide from the world.
The result is a profound sense of humiliation and shame, triggering an intense need to restore their tarnished image.
How Does a Narcissist React to Being Blocked?
When a narcissist is blocked, they are likely to react in several different ways, starting with manipulation, and then escalating to tactics such as abuse by proxy, smear campaigns, or even verbal abuse and aggression.
Here’s a closer look at these common reactions:
Manipulation is a key strategy employed by narcissists to maintain control over their relationships. When blocked, the narcissist is at first likely to react manipulatively, using various tactics to regain their grip and restore their narcissistic supply.
These tactics often include gaslighting, love bombing, and hoovering.
Gaslighting: Twisting Reality
Gaslighting is a potent form of psychological manipulation that involves distorting someone’s perception of reality. The goal is to make the individual question their memory, judgment, and even sanity.
A narcissist who has been blocked is likely to use this tactic to deflect blame and maintain their inflated self-image.
They will deny their abusive behavior, insist it never happened or that you’re misremembering events.
They will also shift the blame onto you, suggesting that their actions were merely responses to your behavior.
Their goal is to create confusion and self-doubt, making it harder for you to trust your own experiences and perceptions.
Love Bombing and Hoovering: Emotional Lures
Love bombing and hoovering are also tactics that the narcissist will use to try to draw you back into the relationship. Both involve showering you with attention, affection, and sometimes, extravagant gestures to win your favor and re-establish the connection.
Love bombing usually takes place at the start of a relationship or after a significant conflict. It involves overwhelming displays of love and admiration, designed to make you feel special and loved. However, this is nothing but an act, used to gain your trust and establish control.
On the other hand, hoovering typically occurs after a breakup or when the narcissist senses they’re losing control.
Named after the Hoover vacuum cleaner, it refers to the narcissist’s attempts to ‘suck’ you back into the relationship. This might involve promises of change, expressions of remorse, or even threats and ultimatums.
Abuse by Proxy: The Role of ‘Flying Monkeys’
In the context of narcissistic abuse, flying monkeys refers to individuals who are manipulated or persuaded to act on behalf of the narcissist.
When a narcissist is blocked, they may react by unleashing their flying monkeys to escalate their campaign of manipulation and control.
Here are some ways that this can manifest:
A blocked narcissist may use flying monkeys to communicate with you indirectly.
This could be in the form of seemingly innocent inquiries about your well-being or more direct messages expressing the narcissist’s thoughts and feelings.
These messages serve as a way for the narcissist to maintain a connection and potentially manipulate your emotions.
Flying monkeys may also be used to spread rumors or misinformation about you.
This can be particularly damaging as it allows the narcissist to tarnish your reputation without appearing to be directly involved.
It’s a form of character assassination that can isolate you from your support network and make you more vulnerable to the narcissist’s manipulations.
In extreme cases, flying monkeys can be used to harass or intimidate you.
This can range from persistent unwanted contact to more overt forms of aggression.
The goal is to provoke fear or distress, further asserting the narcissist’s control over you.
How to Protect Yourself When You Block a Narcissist
Blocking a narcissist can be a challenging process, but it’s often necessary for your own mental and emotional well-being.
Here are some steps to protect yourself during this process:
1. Set Firm Boundaries: Before blocking, it’s essential to establish clear boundaries. This could mean telling the narcissist directly that you no longer wish to communicate with them or indirectly by limiting your responses and availability.
2. Block All Communication Channels: Blocking should be comprehensive. This means blocking their phone number, social media accounts, and email addresses. If they have other ways of contacting you, block those as well.
3. Seek Support: It’s crucial to lean on your support network during this time. Friends, family, or a mental health professional can provide emotional support and guidance.
4. Document Everything: If the narcissist becomes aggressive or threatening, it’s important to document everything. This could be useful if you need to involve law enforcement or apply for a restraining order.
5. Prioritize Self-Care: Blocking a narcissist can be emotionally draining. Remember to take care of your physical, mental, and emotional health. This could mean engaging in activities you enjoy, eating well, exercising regularly, or seeking therapy.
6. Stay Firm: The narcissist will try to manipulate you into changing your mind. They will use guilt, anger, or even charm to get you to unblock them. Stay firm in your decision and remind yourself why you chose to block them in the first place.
Remember, it’s okay to prioritize your own well-being and mental health. If a relationship is causing more harm than good, it’s okay to step away.
Blocking a narcissist can be an emotionally taxing, yet essential step in reclaiming your mental and emotional well-being. It’s crucial to remember that you have every right to protect yourself from toxic influences and maintain your peace of mind.
While the narcissist may react aggressively, their reactions are reflections of their own insecurities and need for control, not a testament to your worth or character. Do not let their reactions sway your decision or make you question your actions.
Remember to lean on your support network during this time and consider seeking professional help if needed. It can be incredibly beneficial to have someone guide you through this process and provide strategies to cope with any fallout.
Ultimately, prioritizing your well-being and mental health is paramount. You deserve respect, peace, and positive relationships in your life. Don’t be afraid to take steps towards ensuring that.
Posts About Going No Contact With a Narcissist
Carla Corelli, a writer, advocate, and survivor of narcissistic abuse, draws from her own upbringing with a narcissistic father to shed light on psychological trauma. Fueled by her personal journey, she pursued a degree in psychology and has dedicated herself to shedding light on the complexities of narcissistic abuse.
With over fifteen years of experience in writing and advocating for survivors, Carla is deeply committed to providing support, education, and empowerment to those who have endured similar trauma. Through her articles, Carla aims to offer a compassionate space for healing and growth, while advocating for greater awareness and understanding of narcissistic abuse.
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